A howl in the void.

"I understand." Zach nodded lightly. "Just, don't do it again... please?" He sighed, wanting to curse himself with how weak he sounded. That was supposed to be firm. But he couldn't help it. He was in love with Roman. "You scared the shit out of me." He admitted. "I don't want it to be like that with us. I won't be scared of you.."

"I would never hurt you Zach. Your my mate. Even today I stopped it before it got out of hand." Roman shook his head. "I cant promise I wont have a tantrum every now and then, but I do promise to never really hurt you." He couldnt if he tried, he recognized Zach as his mate, his reason for living.

"Thank you." Zach let out a soft sigh, looking up at the other man. That was good enough for him. "And you know... if you ever want to talk about things, like your family, I can always listen." He smiled softly. He knew Roman was strong and proud, like him, but he always wanted his lover to be able to talk to him if he needed. Everyone needed someone to talk to.

"I know, its just not something I like talking about." He used to regret being the one that lived. Now though he was glad to be here, glad to have Zach. "Your the only person I would talk to though ."

"Well, I'm glad for that." Zach smiled. "You know, Roman... I think I'm in love with you." He had admitted it to himself a while ago although he hadn't said it aloud yet.

"Well." Roman leaned down, resting their foreheads together. "I know im in love with you. Dont forget im mating for life..." After Zach there could never be anyone else.

"Good." Zach smiled simply, standing on his tip toes to kiss the man's lips gently. He already knew he wanted to be with Roman for life.

Late that night, when everything was cleaned from the day's events and everyone was forgiven, they found themselves curled up in bed together. They'd both been asleep for quite some time when Zach began moaning softly in his sleep, the moans and groans getting progressively louder by the second. He rolled over, away from Roman, his body scrunched tighter than it had been previously as his peaceful dream turned into a nightmare.

Roman had been awake ever since the first irregular beat of Zach 's heart. His nose scrunched at the stench of distress coming from the boy. "Zach." Roman reached out, pulling him so Zach 's back was flush against his even as he sat up. "Zachariah." The man whimpered as he sensed his mates fear. He nuzzled the boy just behind his ear, repeating his name in a frantic mantra.

Zach's eyes shot open the second Roman touched him. He was wide awake and yet he hadn't quite grasped that it had just been a dream yet. He practically jumped to the other side of the bed, eyes wide and fearful, his chest heaving with rapid, shallow breaths.

"Zach." Roman inched closer to the boy, his voice soft as he tried for Zach's hand. "You need to breath okay? Like me." He pulled the boys hand to his chest, over his heart. "Breath with me..." He was desperate to make the boy calm down, afraid he could have a heart attack.

Zach squirmed even farther away, his nails digging into the mattress as he grabbed fistfuls of the sheets, his breathing not getting any better as he shook his head. His eyes were wide, pupils dilated. The walls were closing in and Roman, while the man normally comforted him because he was like a large teddy bear, just seemed so large and intimidating...

Roman refused to simply let the boy go, pulling Zach back to him and cooing gently in his ear. He tried leeching, unsure if the boy was in physical pain or not.  He received nothing but chills up and down his spine.  "Zach baby, you have to breath.  Please breath with me.  Im here and your safe and i'll die before anyone gets to you.  Just calm down, breath."

Zach trembled in Roman's grasp, looking up at the man and trying to remind himself that he was safe. He was at the stage where he realized what was going on but he was too far into the attack to simply stop. Trever had always been the only one who knew exactly what to do when he had a panic attack, and Zach wished he could bring himself to tell Roman how to help him. But he was shaking too hard and he couldn't catch his breath. He clung onto Roman tightly, maybe a bit too lightly, nails digging into the man's back as he wrapped his arms around him.

"There you go, just hold onto me." Roman rocked the boy like he would a small child, one of his large hands moving in soothing circles on the Zach's back. "Trying to breath, think about me okay? You know i'd never let anything hurt you." The man crooned as he dropped kisses to the boys head.

Zach kept one hand firmly on Roman's back, pressing himself deep into Roman's chest as he tried to breathe. The other hand moved to grab one of Roman's hands, which were nearly twice the size of his own and pressed it against his stomach, over a prominent scar. He never knew why but it helped, feeling his stomach moving in and out as he tried to steady his breaths.

Roman kept his hand where Zach placed it, rubbing gently in an attempt to comfort the boy.  "See, its getting better..."  Roman wasnt sure if he spoke to himself or Zach.

Zach let out his breaths slowly, trying to keep calm. His shoulders still shook slightly as he pulled back, glancing up to Roman.
"I'm so sorry..." He sighed although he couldn't quite let go of the man yet. This happened sometimes, though it hadn't since he'd met Roman yet. It was terrible when he was alone. Roman made it easier.

"Don't be. Just breath." That was all he wanted out of the boy, to know he was breathing okay again. "I've got you..." He wondered what had spooked the boy so badly, yet still refrained from asking.

"God, I'm sorry." Zach repeated, leaning his head against Roman's shoulder. "I'm okay... don't panic or anything." He sighed. "I should have warned you.. I have panic attacks." He didn't look up at the man as he spoke, quite embarrassed for acting how he had but he couldn't help it.

"Panic attacks." Roman repeated, he hand never stopping from its course on Zach's back. "I can handle that, don't worry. Just tell me how to take care of you." He could smell the boys shame, growling softly in the back of his throat. "Its okay Zach, I promise."

"It's just so... pathetic." He groaned softly, glancing up at the other man. "This is the first time I've had one since I met you. I've been so happy with you, it hasn't happened. But I guess the fight earlier had me upset and even though we fixed it, I was still stressed.." He'd had them nearly every night right after the breakup with Elvis. "If I do it again... I try to run sometimes, and get away from people but just hold me, okay?" He was so ashamed to even be asking this of his lover. He hated it. "Don't let me run away, I'll get worse." He averted his gaze once more, looking down.

"I wont let you go." Roman assured fiercely, his arms strong around Zach. "And don't feel bad about it, you can't help it Zach." The man chided sternly, though his lips were soft when they pressed against the boys temple.

"And if I ever get too bad... if you can't get control of me or something, just watch what I do. I'll probably hide in a corner or something, but sometimes I... kind of freak out. I'll pass out after too long, though." He informed. He hadn't ever wanted to need to tell Roman any of this, but while he was talking he wanted to get it all out. "Thank you..." He squeezed the man's hand tightly.

Roman was quiet for sometime, his mind sorting over what Zach may have meant by freak out. He was sure he would see though, and when the time came he would be ready. He would know what to do. "I love you Zach. its my job to protect you. Don't thank me." He sighed softly into the air. "Is there anything I can do for you?"

"Honestly? Hold me for tonight and then do me a favor and pretend it didn't happen." Zach sighed softly, kissing the man's cheek. "It shouldn't happen again, I promise.."