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Eustass Kidd

Eustass Kidd

Posts : 351
Join date : 2015-11-20

Hello? Empty
PostSubject: Hello?   Hello? EmptyMon Dec 21, 2015 1:52 am

Happy day six of shipmas <333  Im sorry I havent been on much lately but I love you and I hope you enjoy the fic. 



"Hello, it's me.  I was wondering if after all these years you'd like to meet to go over everything. They say that time's supposed to heal ya, but I ain't done much healing."
Bellamy thought his heart was going to stop as he listened over the voice mail, hitting replay several times in order to wrap his mind around it. The boy sounded so defeated...Bellamy could almost see the tears in his eyes.
 Britt had called him while he was out with Vitaly, and when he received no answer the boy had left Bellamy with a soft voiced message.
The soldier could tell that he was edging on an anxiety attack. They were rare but they'd happened.
He could hear one of their old songs playing softly in the back ground, along with Sawyer's muffled snoring.
Britt was laying beside the man he had claimed as a mate, and yet still missing his soldier.
How ironic.
Bellamy cringed to remember all of the heartbroken messages he had left for Britt during his first week home after their break up.   Looking back now he could only imagine how pathetic he had sounded.
But Britt...Even when his voice was wobbling, the boy managed to sound so clear and graceful.
Bellamy would be lying if he said he didn't miss that.

"Hello, can you hear me?
I'm in California dreaming about who we used to be
When we were younger and free
I've forgotten how it felt before the world fell at our feet
There's such a difference between us
And a million miles..."
It was the anniversary of their breakup.
His and Bellamy's parting of ways.
Britt could only heave a heavy sigh at the thought of what he had been doing at this time four years ago.  He had been sitting at his dining room table, with his head in his hands and tears coursing down his cheeks as he attempted to figure out how he would word his letter.
He remembered thinking that it would be for the best.  He was not ready for that kind of commitment and Bellamy deserved better.
He had deserved better.
So truly, he had no right to be cradling his phone against his ear, heart breaking a little more every time a ring would go unanswered.
Bellamy never picked up for him anymore.
But Britt couldn't help himself, he left the messages anyways, even knowing that it would break his heart even worse when the soldier never returned his call.  Bellamy deserved to know that he was still thought about, that all their love and the nights he had spent worshiping Britt in the sheets had truly meant something to the redhead.  He hated to imagine that the man thought he was merely a fling.
He had been so much more than that.
He was so still much more than that.
And Britt never stopped dreamed of him.  
The boy would dream of strong hands and taught muscle, a grin so charming and adorable that Britt was certain it alone would be enough to end the most ferocious of wars.  Bellamy simply had a way about him, a way to make Britt feel like some goddess that had been made for love.  No one had ever made him feel that way before.  He had always been left feeling cheap and slightly used, but with Bellamy he knew that he was cherished.
In his dreams, he was still that person.
But a lot had changed since then.  He was with Sawyer now and he was in love despite all of his dreaming.  The young werewolf was nothing like his soldier had been though.
And Bellamy had changed, too.  Britt simply couldnt be sure of how much being the man would never pick up his phone.

"Hello from the other side
I must've called a thousand times
To tell you I'm sorry for everything that I've done
But when I call you never seem to be home."

This message had hit him hard, so powerful that it had knocked the breath out of Bellamy in  a way that not even armed combat rivaled.  Britt was wanting to talk to him, to apologize and fix their broken relationship.  But the boy was right, Bellamy was never home anymore.  He had finally moved on to someone else, someone who loved him so much that they had been willing to give up their entire lives so that he could keep his.
The soldier could not waste any more time loving Britt.  He had done enough of that while they were together, his deepest affections lasting a total of three years.  It had taken him that long, 1400 days before he was able to truly look at another human being and feel as though he were okay enough to try again.  Bellamy had refused to attempt a relationship unless he would be able to put his full heart into it.
Vitaly was the first person he'd found since Britt that was worth the effort of picking up the pieces.

"Hello from the outside
At least I can say that I've tried
To tell you I'm sorry for breaking your heart
But it don't matter, it clearly doesn't tear you apart

Bellamy cringed at the words coming through the receiver.  He didnt understand his guilt.  It was only fair that he move on after so long.
And Britt had his chance.  Bellamy could remember writing the boy back and begging him to wait.  He had tried to tell him about all the love he would be missing out on.
Because really, had their been anything not to love about Britt?  It destroyed the soldier inside to imagine Sawyer getting to enjoy all those things he had adored. It wasnt only that though.  Sawyer got to appreciate all of Britt's precious things and the boy was still a complete asshole.  Bellamy thought himself hard to anger, but the mere sight of Sawyer squeezing too hard or yanking at Britt had  the soldier's blood boiling. And all the cursing he did, obviously not giving a damn about showing Britt any kind of respect.
The boy deserved better.
He had left Bellamy for better.
So what was he doing with such a punk?

"Hello, how are you?
It's so typical of me to talk about myself, I'm sorry
I hope that you're well
Did you ever make it out of that town where nothing ever happened?
It's no secret that the both of us
Are running out of time"

Britt would wake some  mornings after a particularly good dream and curl into the warm arms surrounding him.  He would realize they were too tan though, then he would look up to see Sawyer's peacefully sleeping face and every time he would be startled by the sight of dark curls and a carefully curving cheek in place of the bright blonde halo and sharp defining lines he that had haunted him in his dreams.
Britt was always reminded then of how he had loved Bellamy.
He had fallen in love with the way the man walked, so innocently catching everyone's eye and yet still only looking at Britt.  He had adored how Bellamy's eyes would shift from dark rolling waves into the softest shades of blue like those  in the summer time.  He had loved the soldiers sweaty palms and his nervous rambling, how he couldn't help but blush and stammer when attempting to flirt.  He missed how Bellamy used to brush his hair away from his face whenever he smiled.
And oh god, that smile.
Everything.  Britt had loved everything.
The way Bellamy had looked at him like he was the only thing that had ever mattered in the world, how the soldier had whispered his name so tenderly when he had needed it the most.  
His missed the taste of the mans mouth and his skin, the way love bites looked when they were littered along the hollow of his throat.
He had loved the scar Bellamy had gotten just under his chin when he was fifteen and the way his eyes had gleamed when he was broken and talking about the people he had killed and the things he had seen.  Britt adored that he was the only one who could put the spark back into those blue orbs, how the soldier seemed to come to life when their lips met. 
Britt had loved Bellamy's laughter.  Laughing with him and because of him and at him.  He missed hearing the man happy because of things he had done.  He missed how Bellamy had looked whenever he was listening, his eyes always so solemn and intent as though he were riding on Britt's every word.  
The way the man had gazed had him when they went on long car rides when the top of his jeep down.
How the soldier used to entangle his fingers into Britt's hair and his sleepy morning voice. 
Britt missed how Bellamy was unable to sleep without making sure he told the boy nearly ten times how he was loved.
Britt missed everything.
He missed Bellamy.

"So hello from the other side
I must've called a thousand times
To tell you I'm sorry for everything that I've done
But when I call you never seem to be home." 

Bellamy had found happiness again, but that had never been able to stop himself from feeling as though his world were ending all over again whenever he noticed Sawyer putting his hands on Britt.
To make it worse, the young werewolf made sure to be extra physically whenever Bellamy was around, to make sure the soldier knew that Britt belonged to him now.
And even though he had Vitaly at his side now, it never failed to make the mans heart fall into the pit of his stomach.
How could this have happened to them?
How could Britt be giving some asshole all the love that was meant for him and him alone.
When Britt had told him "I love you"  It had felt like all those moments when he was so happy that he felt like it could never end, or he was so sad that he felt nothing would ever be right again.  It was just an infinite feeling, Britt's love.  The soldier had thought that it was forever, the complete and total love of his life. 
Britt had said he loved Bellamy.  Couldn't imagine a future without him.
But here they were four years later and Sawyer was enjoying all of the soldier's most precious treasures.
Bellamy couldn't help but feel betrayed.
How could Britt ever love anyone else in the same way?
It wasn't fair.
So Bellamy could never bring himself to return the boys calls.
They went unanswered.

Hello from the outside
At least I can say that I've tried
To tell you I'm sorry for breaking your heart
But it don't matter, it clearly doesn't tear you apart
Anymore, oooooh
Hello from the other side
I must've called a thousand times
To tell you I'm sorry for everything that I've done
But when I call you never seem to be home
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