If I knew.

Blaine crossed his arms, his pout growing. He loved Barry. He had endured much abuse, and was it only because of Killian and Barry not wanting to be attached?
"Thats mean mister meanie pants."

"Blaine." Barry sighed softly, turning to his lover. "You know I love you. But you also know that I didn't at first. You were just for sex until I fell for you. And that was the best thing that ever happened to me." He kissed the top of Blaine's head.

"I know....". Blaine had loved Barry long before Barry had loved him. Barry had just been Blaine's heart, and still was.
"I love you too mister meanie pants! "

Barry smiled softly, pecking his lover's lips.
"So don't worry. I love you now and that's all that matters."

"Im not worried! You are my mister meanie pants! You love me!". Blaine pouted but he knew Barry loved him. That made everything okay.

"Of course I do." Barry smiled softly, stroking Blaine's hair with one hand, the other holding Killian close to him.

Killian gave a rather morbid laugh, pressing into his father.
"Ah guess ah wasnt soh dumb ta want ya as mah daddeh."

Barry smiled sadly down at his son, kissing his temple.
"I'm sorry..." He murmured again.

"Meh too.". He blinked slowly as he remembered being called Trever. "Ya realleh missed momma didn't ya?"

"I did... i missed him a lot back then." He had been a wreck.

"Ya don' anymore? Ever?". Killian found it hard to believe with how wrapped up with Trever he had been.

"Of course I do. But I have Blaine now. And it's not fair to him to be pining over Trever all the time. There are moments where I miss him but I have a better life with Blaine now. And Trever has a life with Toni."

"Ya still never farget yar first love. Agh guess ah jus always wanted ya ta beh with mom.". Killian had always wanted a family, a complete family. He never brought it up though since bOth parents seemed to be happy.

"I'm sorry I couldn't give you a real family like that sweetheart." He smiled sadly at the boy. "I wish I could have for you but it just wasn't going to work out between us."

"Liar." Killian shook his head."Don lie ta meh.". He knew they would have been fine together. He could see even now that if not for Toni and Blaine they could have something.

"I'm not Killian. I couldn't be with him anymore. I could have hurt him way too easily. I couldn't take it." He had too much of a temper to be with someone like Trever.

Killian raised an eye brow to his father, cocking his head to the side.
"Why care soh much?"

"Because he was the most precious thing in my life. And if I hurt him... I couldn't live with myself anymore." Barry said simply.

Killian leaned into his father, considering this.
"Ya still afraid of hurtin' em?"

"No." Barry shook his head. "It was only when I was with him 24/7. During sex was the worst." He sighed. He was rough during sex and Trever had always been sensitive about his ass being touched.

Killian took this in, writing it down in his head that he would need to protect his mother. He had always thought Barry would do it, but he could take over.
"Alrigh' then. Ah guess."

"I'm still protective of him, I just know I won't hurt him anymore." Barry sighed.

"How so?" Killian raised a brow. "An why care if ya hurt em? Yar nowt with em anymore.". His father was a confusing man.

"Cause I still love him. He's my best friend whether we're together or not." Barry said simply. "I know I won't hurt him anymore because I'm not with him all the time. I only see him for a little bit and I can control myself when I'm with him."

Killian watched his father closely, giving a light smile. Barry loved Trever. He had to. If not, he would not care about hurting him. Even now he seemed to have a plan worked out in his mind so that he doesnt hurt him.
It made Killian happy to think his parents still had love for each other. "Ya love em. Ya might beh woth Blaineh, but ya don' worreh about hurting him like ya doh mom.".