If I knew.

Barry groaned quite loudly as the tight walls took him in. Killian was the youngest he had been with, the tightest. It was killing him.
"Shh..." He let his hand run through the boy's hair as he rested inside of him.

Killian reached up to try and push Barry off, kicking his legs wildly as he squalled up at the man. "Y-Ya lied! E-E-t hwurts!!" The boy's blue eyes were full of tears, his bottom lip jutting out as his expression was over taken with his pain.

"It'll be okay." Barry reassured calmly, wrapping his arms around the tiny boy and pressing him into his chest as he began to move, sliding in and out with the boy's blood as a lubricant.

Killian struggled pitifully, turning his face into the crook of Barry's neck as his wails died down into small cries. The boy almost couldn't take the pain, feeling himself on the verge of unconsciousness, so much that he wished he would just pass over that line. He did not want to feel this anymore.

"Shh Trever, it'll be okay." Barry whispered softly as he thrust into the tiny boy, not even realizing as he called him by the name of his former lover. His thrusts became gentler, trying to help the boy not hurt so badly.

Killian blinked tears away, his hands moving to brace himself against Barry.
"Wh-Who ish T-Treveh?" He sniffled pitifully, though his childish mind snapping to attention as he became curious.

"Shh don't cry." Barry was lost in those big blue eyes, not even registering what the boy said. "Don't cry." He cooed softly, wiping tears from the boy's eyes with his thumbs, letting his lips press against Killian's in a soft kiss.

Killian's eyes never closed, but he let himself be kissed without question. As a four year old he did not grasp any pleasure from this but the man was being really sweet, even though he was hurting him. He had never been treated so kindly before.
And so he allowed Barry to do as he pleased, still finding a way to trust him, if only because he was being so gentle.

Barry kissed the boy sweetly, slowing down to a gentle pace as if he was making love to him. And in his mind, he was. This was Trever underneath him again. He pressed Killian closer to him, moving his lips against the young child's slowly.

Killian gazed up to Barry curiously, his mouth tilted down in a frown. The man seemed lost, like he was not even in the room anymore, his mind was gone in a way.
Killian moved to hug Barry around the neck, hiccuping softly.
"A-Ahm sorreh."
He was sorry for his life.
And he was sorry for Barry's.

"What are you sorry about sweetheart?" Barry smiled softly, nuzzling the boy's cheek as he spoke, a soft look in his eyes.

"Ah'm sorry yar sad." He nodded his head, leaving off the part where he was sorry that he had ever been born. He normally could care less about the horrible men who defiled him, but Barry was different.
Barry was familiar in a way, like he had seen his eyes and heart his voice and felt at home with at one time, but Killian could not remember him.
Unknowingly to Killian though, Barry was the father he dreamed of every night in his sleep. Barry was the face he would see in his distant memories, the voice he had heard singing him to sleep.

"I'm not sad." Barry grinned. "I'm happy. I have you here." Barry nodded, kissing the boy sweetly as he made love to him.

Someone was happy to have him....
That was good enough for Killian, even if it was only for sex and what not, it meant the world to the young boy. Killian found himself clenching his walls around Barry simply to try and make it better for him.

"Oh Trever." Barry moaned softly, hugging the boy tightly. "I love you so much." He groaned, kissing Killian once more.

Killian quirked a small smile, even though he felt his entrance being damaged he could not help it.
Maybe Barry was not talking to him exactly, but no one had ever said they loved him before.
"Ah'm Killian." The boy spoke up softly

But the boy went unheard. Maybe Barry was simply choosing not to acknowledge the fact that this boy was not Trever, no matter how much he looked like him.
"Are you hurting?" He whispered gently, wanting to make sure his "lover" was okay.

"A-Ah'm fine." Killian stuttered up at Barry, his eye brows furrowing as the man continued. At least he was being nice. Maybe he was being really weird, maybe he was losing his mind. Either way, Killian felt safe with him.
"Still hurts but ah'm fine." He nodded his head as he spoke, he was too busy looking at Barry to be worried with the pain he felt at his entrance.

"Good." Barry cooed softly, running a gentle hand down Killian's cheek. He missed Trever so much... "God, I love you." He was so close already. Killian was incredibly tight.

"Uh....Ah..." He couldn't say it back, he didn't understand love. But he did continue letting Barry use his body to pleasure himself, laying back and not struggling.

Barry decided not to register this as he sped up, faster as he tried to pleasure the young boy as much as he could, even though deep down he knew it wouldn't be good for him.
"Trever!" He cried out, his release spurting out deep inside of Killian.

Killian winced lightly but other than that simply stayed still, his eyes wide as he stared up at Barry, a question sitting on the tip of his tongue.
Who was Trever?

Barry slowly pulled out, pressing his lips to Killian's passionately before laying beside the boy, tugging the covers over them and pulling Killian close as it sunk in that this was not his Trever...

Killian had a part of Trever in him though, unbeknownst to Barry.
"Who is Treveh?" Killian blinked up at Barry rather innocently, though half lidded eyes. He could not deny that he was tired, and plus his entrance continued to throb painfully.

"Trever is my old boyfriend." Barry admitted, not sure why he was honest with the boy. He pressed Killian to his side though, holding him tight.