Don't Wake Me Up

Izzy found himself getting no sleep but he didn't mind. He just stayed up, holding the boy and sitting there with his thoughts, attempting to figure out his feelings.

Elvis slept on and off until late in the day, never once allowing Izzy to get away from him. The man had become the only thing keeping him grounded. When he finally woke enough to stay awake, he spoke without opening his eyes.
"What did I do last night, yeah?" He remembered bits and pieces.
Remember Xavier's words.
Suddenly he wanted to go back to sleep.

"From what I gathered, Xavier said something hurtful." If the boy didn't remember he certainly wasn't going to go into detail. "You got high and came to me. We talked and I made you go to sleep." He didn't want to embarrass Elvis by telling him...

"Thanks for the pg version, yeah." Elvis's voice had a slight edge to it. "But if you don't mind, I think I have a right to know what kind of sh*t I did last night." He knew it couldn't be good, and as much as he would hate hearing it, he needed to know just in case he had ultimately f*cked up. "I know what Xavier said. I know I was at Mack's. I dont remember what all I took, yeah." He paused, his eyebrows furrowed in thought. "I wanted to sleep with you. You said no." He was trying to recall everything, his head aching with the effort.

"You did." Izzy sighed. "Don't worry, I'm not upset, I'm not going to tease you. You were high, I understand." He kissed the boy's cheek. "I just hope you're okay."

"Yeah..." Elvis was quiet, his heart beating in his ears as Xavier's words crossed him again and again. He almost couldn't stand it. Once an addict always an addict.
That was alright. Elvis could be a druggie and Xavier could go f*ck himself. "Thanks for letting me crash here." When he finally blinked his eyes open, they were bloodshot and watery. Elvis didn't know what his life even was anymore. "I guess imma go home, yeah." He was certain Azazel had to be tired of him by now.

"Don't go, please." Izzy sighed, reaching out for the boy. "I want you to stay here. I want to help."

"Izzy, you were helping, believe me." Or he had thought so. Xavier had a point though. Even when he was clean he had wanted the drugs so desperately. He hadn't done them though...but there was no avoiding it. He was addicted and this was his life. "But I don't think theirs help for me anymore, yeah. I'd hate to drag you down with me."

"You can always get help, Elvis. I'm going to keep helping you. Even if you mess up a thousand more times, I'm going to help. We're going to get you through this. Your Elvis Lively, not just some addict. You're so much more than that. Just let me help." He reached out, taking both of the boy's hands in his own, squeezing gently.

Elvis was stunned silent as he listened to Izzy, his stomach flipping as he thought: God I need him. No one had ever reached out for Elvis like Izzy was, never tried to help him through his lonely nights and withdraws. "Izzy..." The 'I love you' was caught in his throat and for a moment he thought he would choke. It ached not to be able to say these things, knowing it would lose him Azazel.

"Elvis... you mean the world to me, okay? We can get you through this. I'm here. No matter what. Now let's clean you up." He nodded to the swollen arms and dried blood around the boy's nose. "Come on."

Elvis looked down at his arms, cursing softly at the ruins of his hard work. "Thanks Izzy...I owe you one." To mean the world to Izzy...it might not be love but it was something. Elvis was so desperate he would take whatever he could get. Elvis rolled himself off of Azazel, cringing at the heat radiating from the swollen parts of his arms.

"Don't feel bad about these... they'll be gone soon enough." Izzy promised as he led Elvis to the bathroom. He gestured for Elvis to sit on the edge of the bathtub, moving to wet a cloth and gently begin washing over the remnants of dried blood on the boy's face and arms.

"I Worked so hard on it though, yeah." Elvis let Izzy clean him up, grateful to have someone wiling to help him. "I got you so ill be able to do it again, but it still sucks." Elvis hadnt looked the man in the eye since waking that morning and remembering the night they had spent together while he was high.

"It does suck." Izzy sighed. "But it's okay. You can't concentrate on that. You just have to start over. You'll be able to do it." He reassured gently.

"I want to knock the piss out of Xavier. Least he coulda have done was say it to my face, yeah." Of course he didn't balme the man for his addiction or for his trip to Mack's house. It had hurt worse to hear Xavier, a man he still loved so much say that. He would get over it though, or Izzy and his father.

"Don't you listen to a word he says, alright?" Izzy frowned, pressing the boy into a light hug. He kind of wanted to punch Xavier in the face, honestly.

"Izzy." Elvis rested heavily on the man, as though sitting up on his own was too much work. "He wasn't wrong. Where did I go last night, yeah? What did I do?" He sluggishly pulled himself back up, ashamed that Izzy was having to clean him up after a night of using.

"Because you're still getting over it. You had only been clean for a few weeks. It will take a while, and it'll be hard, but when you're completely clean, I think you can do it." He smiled softly at the boy.

Elvis wanted to scream. The only person who believes in him, cares about him, doesnt believe in loving him. It was just his life.
"Im going to try, yeah." He could do it again, this time though he didnt have as much hope.

"Good, and I'm going to help you." Izzy nodded. "What do you think about staying with me for a few days? I'm not trying to control you I just... want to watch over you and make sure you're okay."

"Watch over me?" Elvis snorted softly, looking down at his colorful arms. "Thats cute and all, yeah, but I think you've spent enough time taking care of me to last you for a year." He wasn't about to step anymore boundaries. Besides, he didnt want to be here if izzy brought a princess home.

"No, really. I'd really like it if you would, Elvis." Izzy gave a gentle smile, and he would admit, he pulled out one of his looks, the one that got him anything he wanted. But really, he only wanted to protect the boy.

Elvis hesitated still, but in the end there was no denying Izzy when he made that face. "Dude...think this through now. I would be here all day, and all night aside from work and whatever else. Plus man, my dad might not like this..." He hadnt spoken to his father since before Xavier's party.

"I wouldn't mind you here, Elvis. Not at all. I could use the company." Izzy nodded, smiling at his friend. "And your father... well, he loves me." Izzy winked, but it was true. Manuel adored Izzy, thought he was perfect for Elvis. Then again, he didn't know about the list, but still. "Let me handle him."